Hot Rod Poetry

[bob w]

Right Said Fred

I wake up with many aches and some pain.
It's beginning to affect my tired, old brain.

Maybe it's because my bed is lumpy.
That I wake up all sore and grumpy.

Get dressed and ready to shop.
My roadster starts with a grind and a pop.

Off I go to the bedding store.
To find something comfy, that will let me snore.

Salesman says, "this one will give you good rest".
"Go ahead, try it, give it a test".

There in front of me is a beautiful mattress.
So I take off my shoes, and start to undress.

Just about ready to drop my drawers.
When the salesman runs over and begins to roar.

"Sorry" I said, "not trying to be rude".
"But you see, I always sleep in the nude".

I put on my clothes outside the place.
Salesman says, "I don't want to see your face".

"Or any other part of you".

So into my roadster I do hop.
I'm off to the hot rod repair shop.

To this I must confess.
My roadster is quite a mess.

The guy that sold me the car.
Said that everything was up to par.

But the brake pedal goes to the floor.
And there's a leak in the radiator core.

The steering is very sloppy.
And the rear end is quite hoppy.

The shop says they can make the repair.
Soon I'll be driving without a care.

So I went to some local shows.
Old time rodders looked down their nose.

Even though my roadster is very cool.
Said I was a fake, don't even own a tool.

I was really hoping to fit in.
I didn't build it is that a sin?

Hot rods I love as much as anyone.
Just cos I bought it, is that a reason to shun?

So I asked the guy who was picking on me.
"You have another hobby? What might it be"?

"I'm a pro bass fisherman, don't mean to gloat".
"Ah" I said, "But did you build your own boat"?

Then a light bulb lit in his head.
"I see what you mean, I'm sorry, Fred".

There's builders and buyers.
There's showers and shiners.
There's drivers and lawn chair riders.

The thing that unites us is most important by far.
It's our mutual love for the hot rod car.

[MercuryMac]

Touche', Bob.
I follow in your footsteps, Bob, well, up to taking my shoes off to lie on a new mattress. And I've tried to argue with guys who discriminate against others. I find that discriminators are emotional thinkers and showing them a lot of logic doesn't usually sway them.
Good one, Bob.

[05snopro440]

Nice one Bob!

[05snopro440]

Originally Posted by MercuryMac

Touche', Bob.
I follow in your footsteps, Bob, well, up to taking my shoes off to lie on a new mattress. And I've tried to argue with guys who discriminate against others. I find that discriminators are emotional thinkers and showing them a lot of logic doesn't usually sway them.
Good one, Bob.

Right you are about swaying those guys.

[lazarat]

Good one Bob...

"Lawn chair riders'....lmao.

[Old Iron]

[bob w]

Yes, hot rodding is a big tent. But there's lots of little rooms inside. Some folks have trouble appreciating what is in the other rooms. To my way of thinking, that's okay. Specialize. Go with what you like. It's normal to have "likes" and "dislikes".

Just remember the basic rules of civility.

And, if there is an outside threat, we support each other.

[23crate]

so im sure it wasnt that long ago
in a "X2" holden cruising we did go
2 in the front and one in the back
beer bravado we hit the track

a raised one lane bridge at night
suburbia was sleeping one for a fright
"dukes of hazard" i said to my bud,
we sped to the bridge, lights a-flood

the lead up to the bridge allowed flight
at least ten feet long we flew that night
less speed a little less at the other end.
fear etched on our back seat freind

us in two in the front decided to do it again
the one in the back "no dont!" he complained
we turned to see 2 feet on the doors
one hand on the roof one on the floor

feet were stretched, his toes clawed
off we took, the accelerator floored
we flew of the end wild a wild yell
except for one who said very little

off we roared into the night
two of giggling fancy free
that dam car flew at least 10 feet
twice that night, at least the same

in one nasty fright the exhaust growling
and the neighbourhood sleeping

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holden_HD

[MercuryMac]

You brought back memories, Crate. My cousin Doug and I grew up together and we could have been the guys in your car. Doug would have been the guy roaring over the raised bridge gap, ---- and I would have been the guy in the back with the unheard voice of reason, holding on to everything.
We were very different, Doug and me, but we got along well, because, without his wild grandiose dreams, I would have had no life. And without me injecting some logic and reason in once in a while, he wouldn't have had a very long life.
Thank you for the poem, Crate.

[soltz]

Good job crate! Thanks