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Smogy's Sleeper

It was 1967, when Smogys dad bought the Fury
A 1963 four door, so here is the story

Dad says, drive me to work, you take the car to school,
Smogy starts tinkering, and it was the dad he would fool

The 318 push button was quick but not enough
Smogy was good with cars, so the job was not tough

Slowly but surely a mod here and there
first a four on the floor, the streets it did tear

Dad says whats this, this thing on the floor,
Dad, the push button was fine, but the shifting was poor

Why dad didn't question the shift with auto trans
he knew nothing about cars, so there it stands

To make a long story short, I will jump ahead
Now it has a 361 with dual exhaust and Hemi heads

Two four barrel carbs topped off this sleeper
Dad did not realize his son had a keeper

But dad didn't care, it was his only son
good with cars, but a spoiled son of a gun

So now he and his posse would cruise U.S. One
looking for action, looking for fun

We raced Mustangs, Chevelles GTOs and Mercs
Many a time making challengers into jerks

many would ask, after getting the sting
"what the hell do you have in that thing??"

But one day, a motor mount snapped, the accelerator stuck
Smogy got it under control, but he was running out of luck

Got it home, a possible grounded hot wire
When Smogy came out, The Plymouth was on fire

He ran for the hose, tried putting it out
But no such luck, had to wait for the FD clout

So there was dad's car, a burned out shell
sat in front of the house, looking like hell

Sat there for a year, the city had enough
They towed it away. Walking can be tough.

Just ask dad.
It's pretty late but here's Chapter eight.

Bill's Big Adventure

Those medical procedures sure can be taxing.
Been a while but now I'm relaxing.

That night at Big Boy's we stood around with our hands in out pockets.
Didn't know what to do with them without wrenches and sockets.

We all had burgers and fries and Cokes.
Couple of the boys told some pretty good jokes.

One of the guys said come with us this Saturday.
We're going out to Lake Elsinore to race and play.

Out in the desert there's this dry lake bed and nobody to care.
You can go as fast as you want, as fast as you dare.

Come Saturday morning and sure enough.
Three roadsters showed up packed with all the right stuff.

The blood red sun was rising in the East.
I was driving in their dust trail, last but not least.

The sweet fragrance from the orchards, the cool morning air.
I was sure nothing in life could ever compare.

We turned South and the scenery did change.
Off in the distance was the mountain range.

In front for the range as flat as a table.
Was the lake bed, wasn't sure if I was able.

You and I would just follow the other's lead.
And hope we would get up to a decent speed.

Out in that barren, beautiful place.
I saw roadsters of many styles and grace.

Young guys chasing their high speed dream.
A smile on their faces, in their eyes a gleam.

On that day we would join a special fraternity.
Hoping it would last for all of eternity.

Friendships that would last for evermore.
Began that day out on Lake Elsinore
Last edited:
I think they still do. Isn't Lake Elsinore disgusting these days? I.E. you don't want to end up in the water, from what I've heard.

My subsequent research pointed that out too. The Creature from the Black Lagoon could be living in the lake.
I know you all have been standing in line. To read Chapter nine.


I'm over 80 and pretty much spent.
But for you, my roadster, there's the same excitement.

We spent 50 years racing on sand and salt.
Before time and sickness brought us to a halt.

I remember that first time, we went one hundred and nine.
Not bad for rookies, and your flathead so fine.

After a while we both knew what we did need.
To satisfy our ever increasing need for speed.

For carbs you had two deuces but needed more.
I went the limit and gave you four.

You hungrily ate the extra gas.
And took me on a 121 pass.

The 400 Jr. was Isky's new grind.
That camshaft was a really great find.

The wind in your radiator, the wind in my face.
One hundred thirty was our record pace.

To go that fast we couldn't run gas.
And we had to move up to a faster class.

My buddies thought we were completely insane.
Yup, I tipped the can, we ran nitromethane.

Oh the sweet smell, the power, the noise!
We really showed all the other boys.

You and I were at the top of our game.
Achieving notariety and a bit of fame.

Yes, we got our name in the record books.
But most of the Road Kings were giving me sidelong looks.

They didn't seem to be enjoying our glory.
But I guess that's another story

My helper is here to put me in bed.
But visions of you will be racing in my head.
Chapter ten, a big fat hen.

Bill Finds Bill

I'm coming down the ramp in my electric chair.
I see the look you give me but don't despair.

You just sit there while I remember more.
Like the time we went to the speed shop store.

We ran the next year from spring 'til fall.
Weren't going any faster, no, not al all.

Burbank was just a short hop.
Went there to the SoCal Speed Shop.

Asked what can I do to hop up my car.
I want to beat those boys, beat 'em by far.

Alex said, "If you really want to have fun.
Put on these special heads made by Ardun."

Ready and raring to give everyone a thrill.
We headed on out to Bonneville!

You were sporting Ardun heads and Hilborn injection.
We beat all in our class, now no more rejection.

Little did I realize when you are the best.
There's more needed to be accepted by the rest.

Little old man, long gray hair, face weathered and worn.
Said to me, " Do ya know why you are treated with scorn?

It's not your beautiful roadster, or the speeds you travel.
Look back and you'll see you let your friendships unravel.

In your quest to become a high speed hero.
Your obsession made you more of a zero.

Heroes are worshiped from afar.
But a friend will buy you a beer at the bar.

A friend will get bloody knuckles while wrenching a bolt or a screw.
Simply for a heartfelt "thank you" from you.

Awards, trophies, and records have come.
But did you forget where you come from?

You better get your butt back to Van Nuys.
And reconnect with the Road Kings, those are your guys.

They'll gladly help you rise to the top.
And help you all hours working in the shop.

Just show the guys proper gratitude.
Let them see you are a humble dude.

Land speed racing fame and fortune is for what I yearned.
But that old man's wisdom was the most valuable lesson I learned.

I've carried it with me since that historic day.
Until now, now that I'm old and gray.

Look out the shop door, our sun is setting.
In to the house I'd better be getting.

To get some sleep, my energy to restore.
Later, we'll talk about what for you I have in store.
Time's a wastin', we better hasten, on to Chapter 11.


Just came back from therapy.
Where did we leave off, let me see.

After all those years of land speed racing.
Most of the other cars we were outpacing.

We were at Bonneville in the fall.
Going after the biggest prize of all.

Down and back one more time
And your star would forever shine.

We would gain the 200 mile an hour club.
On this run we could not flub.

202 down wind we did sail
And I knew we cold not fail.

Oh! We were flying high.
Pushed you to the limit, how hard we did try.

A gust of wind caught me by surprise.
Blew off my goggles, got salt in my eyes.

I knew I had to go slow.
But you urged me to go, go, go.

Somehow you held the line.
The trophy was yours, not mine

My trophy room is stuffed with many a treasure.
The one that gives me the most pleasure.

Is the one engraved with 200.5.
And on that fateful day we did survive.

To this day I tell anyone who will listen.
Though my tired old eyes will begin to glisten.

Over 200 and you followed that line.
I couldn't see, you did just fine.

My affection for you shows, I'm fill with pride.
Yes, that historic day when I was just along for the ride.

Just got bad news from wife number three.
Sais, "Either the roadster goes or it's me."

"Choose one, me or the roadster."
"Goodbye dear, you can take the toaster."

You know that cute therapist that was here before?
Wonder if she would like to be wife number four.
"Choose one, me or the roadster."
"Goodbye dear, you can take the toaster."

Terrific! LMAO [cl

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